The More I Grow, the Less I Know

Scripture

15This is a trustworthy saying, and everyone should accept it: “Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners”—and I am the worst of them all. 16But God had mercy on me so that Christ Jesus could use me as a prime example of his great patience with even the worst sinners. Then others will realize that they, too, can believe in him and receive eternal life. 1 Timothy 1:15-16

Observation

It’s interesting to note that the Apostle who once described himself as a “Hebrew of Hebrews” now describes himself as “The Chief of Sinners.” This is not a man who is self-deprecating as much as it’s a follower of Jesus who is self-aware in the light of the mercy and grace of Jesus Christ. In fact, when I take a look at Paul’s letters in order of the timeline in which they were written it’s easy to see a pattern of how maturity leads to humility.

1. “Least of the Apostles”

📖 1 Corinthians 15:9

“For I am the least of the apostles and do not even deserve to be called an apostle, because I persecuted the church of God.”

🗓 Date written: c. A.D. 55📍 Context: Paul is reflecting on his past as a persecutor of the church and God's grace in calling him.

2. “Less than the least of all the Lord’s people (saints)”

📖 Ephesians 3:8

“Although I am less than the least of all the Lord’s people, this grace was given me: to preach to the Gentiles the boundless riches of Christ.”

🗓 Date written: c. A.D. 60–62📍 Context: Paul is in prison, marveling at the privilege of proclaiming the gospel to the Gentiles.

3. “Chief of sinners” (or “worst of sinners”)

📖 1 Timothy 1:15

“Here is a trustworthy saying that deserves full acceptance: Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners—of whom I am the worst.”

🗓 Date written: c. A.D. 63–65📍 Context: Paul is writing to Timothy toward the end of his life, deeply aware of his unworthiness and the grace of God.

Application

Charles Spurgeon described the gospel of downward mobility this way, “The closer a man is to God, the more he sees his sin.” Paul went from “Hebrew of Hebrews” to “Chief of Sinners” — because the closer he got to Jesus, the more clearly he saw his need for grace.  This is quite the contrast to what I have seen in many Christian leaders who gradually become more full of themselves than full of The Spirit.  Instead of climbing a ladder to success I’m climbing a ladder to the floor as I kneel before the throne of grace. The backward journey forward is described in the beatitudes so I’m not sure why I’m so surprised that spiritual growth often looks like stepping down, not up.  The very first Kingdom value out of the mouth of Jesus says it all, “Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.”  It begins with recognizing our deep need and insufficiency before God. Spiritual maturity begins when we stop thinking we’re already there. Have I been spending more time on bolstering my resume or repenting for my sin?  The paradox of the Kingdom of God is that down is the new up. Self-promotion can easily become self-deception leading to self-consumption. CS Lewis put it this way, “If you walk away from me and forget me, you’ve lost nothing. But if you walk away from Jesus and forget Him, you’ve lost everything."  My  mission, like that of John the Baptist, is to prepare the way for my Savior: “He must increase and I must decrease.”(John 3:30).  Jesus gets the spotlight. I’m just holding the flashlight.

Prayer

We are almost at the half way point of 2025 and this is a good time to stop and listen to You the coach of my soul at halftime. Thank You for reminding me that my identity is found and forged in the light of Your grace and not my own goodness. Holy Spirit, continue to reveal the places where I’ve been making this about me instead of You. Jesus, thank you for being so patient with me. “For what we preach is not ourselves, but Jesus Christ as Lord, and ourselves as your servants for Jesus’ sake.” (2 Corinthians 4:5)